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Does it make you a bad parent if you consider giving up your baby

Not to start a debate I'm just asking I'm confused!

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Your kidding right? This is an adoption forum? I'm an adoption facilitator and educator ...You just set me back how many years?? Sweet Beginnings Adoptions is focusing on educating non profits and social workers in child welfare about removing the shame from adoption- why it has to be an option for some families. Not everyone has the capacity to parent..and I mean everybody..those who are able to get pregnant and those that aren't. Just because someone wants to adopt doesn't mean that they should. Professionals should be assessing for capacity when they meet with clients. Getting back to relinquishment....we need to be open about adoption..we need to make it okay..we need to provide support. Family of origin is always best, but only when it is stable, loving and safe.

Umm I was just asking a question ,because I'm about to start my search for a great adoption agency an a great home for my bby girl! 

Lisa Sweet said:

Your kidding right? This is an adoption forum? I'm an adoption facilitator and educator ...You just set me back how many years?? Sweet Beginnings Adoptions is focusing on educating non profits and social workers in child welfare about removing the shame from adoption- why it has to be an option for some families. Not everyone has the capacity to parent..and I mean everybody..those who are able to get pregnant and those that aren't. Just because someone wants to adopt doesn't mean that they should. Professionals should be assessing for capacity when they meet with clients. Getting back to relinquishment....we need to be open about adoption..we need to make it okay..we need to provide support. Family of origin is always best, but only when it is stable, loving and safe.

Then I hope you see by what I wrote it DOES NOT! I thought you were coming from an adoptive parent side..which is why I probably came down harder on you. It is so not wrong. Deciding on an adoption plan is a hard decision and should never be taken lightly. Adoption is forever, it is not a temporary fix for a situation. I am happy to email you off list some questions you need to consider and all open adoption can be for you and your family. email me at sweetbeginningsadoptions@yahoo.com

Of course not. I became pregnant as a teen and seriously considered giving my son up for adoption because I wasn't sure that I would be what was best for him. I ultimately decided to keep my son and raise him , but I don't think for a minute that giving him up would have made me a bad parent. It's not an easy choice to make ,it's a hard choice because it means do what is best for your child even if its not you.

No, I do not think it makes you a bad parent if you consider adoption.  As an adoptive mom myself, I know the love my son's birth mom has for him and will forever have for him.  I never thought for once she was a bad parent.  I cannot ever imagine what she went through as the choice of adoption has to be the hardest decision she has ever made.  I think what is important is to follow your heart and you will know what is best for you and your baby......

I agree - it does not make you a bad parent. Good luck finding a family if that's what you decide.

My natural mom gave me up up because the situation she was in , wasn't the best. she wanted more for me and was honest enough to realize that she couldn't cope.

She didn't want to have any other kids after me, it was traumatizing this event in her life, however she fell pregnant, twice again. By this time, she and my father had a more stable life and relationship and were married. She was a wonderful mother to my sister and brother and now that we are in reunion, she tries her best towards me.

So no, I don't think that a person is necessarily bad because they give their kid up for adoption. I guess it all depends on the person and situation.

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