Adoption Voices

Ok, so we have an odd situation.  Please chime in if you can think of any creative ways to help out! 

Hubby and I originally had a private homestudy done because we weren't interested in becoming foster parents.  Well we sent out over 300 studies all over the US. All we heard numerous times from other agencies was that they were hesitant to place children with us because we hadn't completed any "foster parent training."  Needless to say, hubby and I finally caved an decided to go the route of DFS.

So now we've completed all of our PS-MAPP training and our case workers are beginning our new homestudy.  And wouldn't you know it - now we're finally gettiing responses back on our old original homestudy!!  Just this week I've been emailed/called by 6 out of state workers!!  Now here's the catch - our NEW workers are extremely upset because we had told them that we were no longer looking at out of state children since going with DFS.  Well. . .the mom in me kept looking & submitting interests on kids.  (shame on me!) But we still had an active original homestudy that we paid major $$ for and I wanted to get my use out of it before it expired.  Not to mention there were some little ones that I really wanted to be considered for.

Well one of my requests got back to the NEW caseworkers and she is saying that I openly lied to her and that she's going to reject our application to become foster parents!  I'm so upset & feel like I completely sabotaged our chance.  Can anyone help?   


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Replies to This Discussion

I would talk to her supervisor. My case worker said that we should openly search for children to be matched with all while waiting to be approved for foster care. Sounds like your case worker isn't very good. I'm so sorry. I hope that if you have been matched, you continue to persue your journey.
If you live in a big enough area, request a new worker. Our licensing worker has been awsome. Our local social worker, is a complete and total jerk, so trust me, I completely understand.
I wish you the very best of luck!
Tell her that you were'n't looking when you told her that, but that you changed your mind and began to look again. And yes, I would talk to her supervisor. Some of our county workers have been real power nuts. Talking about going to a supervisor has always helped - we've never had to actually do it. Good luck, and I think you have every right to keep your search options open. Julie
I think that as a former foster parent who has Adoptive Children that I have an idea of what maybe is happening here. I feel that once a caseworker starts saying that you lied about something that is so clear that the main thing that is on here mind is that you had a certain intent to decieve. I think what you need to tell her is that you felt at the time that the road to adoption that you were pursuing was not going to materialize and acted on that thought when you told her her you were not going to pursue that anymore. By getting a response from the agencys that you sent the former homestudies that they were "still interested in you". I think that a supervisor may be more "reasonable about it". No that you are not alone in these types on conflicts.
I'm with a private adoption facilitator AND with the state DHS! I'm actively seeking wherever I can and both my private specialist and my state caseworker are very supportive. I guess every state is different.
Thanks everyone for all of your answers. They ended up rejecting our Foster Parent license anyways. I tried to speak with a supervisor and her basic answer was "go pound sand." It's been really heartbreaking. The way it works here is that you have to complete PS-MAPP and have your homestudy completed by this case worker. If she says 'no' then that's it. They did give us the option to withdraw and re-apply at a later date which is what we did just so that we weren't flagged with a rejection. But really, who wants to re-apply after that?

So for now my days of doing something special for a child are now over, we've decided to try having kids the old fashioned way. I'm so sick of the games that come with adoption.
Wow, you would think with all of the kids out there in fostercare who need homes that the worker would have been more open about this situation.. So sad....




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