Am I strong enough for this?

Comment

Comment by Yvonne Zoe Williams-Barker on November 13, 2012 at 8:55pm

The first child that we were called about was Ethan and he was 10 days old.  Ethan was in California.  I got on the first plane out the next day, my husband was to get there later because his soft ball team was traveling at the time 2010.  By the time I arrived, the agency called and said  the birth mom changed her mind.  I felt heartbroken, but Ethan was my first baby.  It is the birthmother's right to change her mind, but I think a birthmom should be sure before she starts the process.  Adoptive parents have no rights and the agency and the birth parents know that as well.  As long as no rules or regulations are in place adoptive parents will get jerked around. 

Comment by Suzanne Margarit on November 5, 2012 at 5:44am

Thank you Kelly... " For me just knowing there could be a chance for me to be a mommy was a chance worth taking each and every time"  I just quoted you.... and that is really what it boils down to... that is how you get through this... protect your heart if you can... but it is a chance worth taking for the beautiful final outcome that I too will have when the time is right!!!!  Please give your son a hug... thank you!

 

Comment by Kelly on November 3, 2012 at 11:53am

 Honetly I  don't think you can protect your heart at least I couldn't.  I think because for me I wanted adoption so much my heart just went out to each and every adoption situation that came our way.  We did finally get blessed with a beautiful son, who is our hearts !  You do have to be willing to take that risk in hopes to one day have your little blessing.  It is far from easy it can be a long, emotional heartbreaking yet heartfelt journey.  For me just knowing there could be a chance for me to be a mommy was a chance worth taking each and everytime.  I feel your pain and hope one day you will be so very blessed.

Comment by Suzanne Margarit on October 30, 2012 at 3:21pm

thank you Crystal...Your words are very comforting and I do beleive what you say in that once the right situation comes along... I will know that that was the plan....is it crazy for me to say that sometimes I feel the plan is for me to feel a bit of this pain so that I can truly appreciate and feel I deserve this little angel soon to come my way?? Is that your little one in your profile picture?  I hope all your parenthood dreams come true...thanks for your post!    

Comment by Crystal on October 30, 2012 at 2:14pm

It is hard. I have unfortunately been there too many times to count now. Over time, it does get easier. A child is loved the minute we know of him/her - whether that's a child growing in our bodies, or in our heart. It is a loss, but one that many believe we do not have the right to mourn. My advice is to take the time to honor your "maybe" child. Love them fiercely in that moment and then take your time to grieve them too. I send hugs and prayers your way. I pray that your child finds his/her way to you soon. When the right situation comes along, I promise you will know it, and know that it was the plan all along. Keep the faith!!